Let me just start by saying that I love my job. I really love my job. But as an au pair, there is a certain amount of pressure to be perfect; to wake up happy, change diapers happily, and be a giant ray of sunshine at all times. Sometimes your days wont be rainbows and ponies—it’ll be tears and tantrums and your head will feel like it’s going to explode.
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But, my friend, never fear! I’ve compiled a fool-proof plan to survive those bad days …
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<h2>1. Find the cause </h2>
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You know your host kids, so you know when something is wrong. They’re usually acting a certain way because something bad has happened. I discovered over my time here that the majority of the bad behavior my host kids exhibit is due to hunger. They’re simply hungry! Who would have thought a Nutella sandwich would solve all of our problems? Search for a rational reason before jumping straight into disciplining them. And ask them what is wrong. Perhaps they are:
&gt; Hungry 
&gt; Tired 
&gt; Frustrated 
&gt; Upset 
&gt; Sick 
&gt; Attention-seeking
Talk to your host kids and find the root of the bad behavior and deal with it accordingly—sometimes it really is just a case of needing a few minutes in time-out to reset their attitude!
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<h2>2. Deal with the cause </h2>
Now that you know why your host kid is acting up, it’s time to treat it. I take care of an 11-, 6-, and 1-year-old and dealing with each of their moods can be very different! So if your 11-year-old is tired, obviously you can’t swaddle her and rock her to sleep with a lullaby—so what do you do!?
<ul>
<li>Sit her down and help her with homework to ease the process</li>
<li>Let her have a break, recharge her batteries before starting the next activities</li>
<li>Read a book to her</li>
<li>Let her know that you understand, make her feel like she’s not battling you</li>
</ul>
Now if my 6-year-old is hungry, then the world ends. I’m talking full on emergency stop, call the Army, because there is about to be a war if there isn’t pasta in front of him in 2.5 seconds! There is no other solution to this other than to feed him and feed him fast. Sometimes the kids just want attention—this one I really struggled with. I tend to forget that they are actually children and not the mini-adults they make me believe they are!
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The older kids love spending quality time together, <a href="https://blog.culturalcare.co.uk/advice/keeping-your-host-kids-occupied/">playing a game</a>, having an ice cream or even asking about their day. You’ll be amazed at the power of one-on-one attention—how taking an interest in something they like and making them feel important to you can totally change their mood. The baby loves some TLC,  a cuddle, a sing-song or reading a book. He can’t tell me what he wants or communicate with me so a good old fashioned cuddle or play time changes his mood instantly!
<h2>3. Do you need a time-out?</h2>
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Sometimes your beautifully well-behaved host kids can push you to the very limit. At that point, you need to decide if you’re the one that needs a time-out. Here’s how to put yourself in an adult time-out:
&#8211; Set your kids up with an activity—reading a book, homework or play time. 
&#8211; Boil the kettle. 
&#8211; Pour yourself a cup of tea. 
&#8211; BREATHE
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You are allowed to have bad days but you need coping mechanisms—and the best way to avoid all the stress is to be prepared which leads me into my final point &#8230;
<h2>4. Failure to prepare is preparing to fail </h2>
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Prep your day. Know that asking your host kids to put their shoes on actually takes 15 minutes before it’s done. Make lunches the night before so you have the time to chase them for said 15 minutes. Make schedules so they’re never left with enough time to get into trouble! It takes a few days of observations to notice what makes your host kids irritable and what causes them to be in bad mood. Once you know the signs, you’ll be able to stop it in its tracks!
Kids will be kids, which unfortunately involves tears, tantrums, and all manners of unpleasant words. The most important thing to remember is that the good days always outweigh the bad. When you look back at your year in America, you wont remember the bad days—<a href="https://www.culturalcare.co.uk/stories/meet-our-host-families">you’ll remember the amazing bond you built with your new family, friends, and country</a>!

Bad Days and How to Survive Them

British au pair Abigail talks about her tried and true methods for calming her host kids down and making it through the occasional bad days. 

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A blog by Cultural Care Au Pair

Bad Days and How to Survive Them

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